Free Pdf uietThe Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking á Susan Cain – latinboyz4play.com
You can also read this review on Flying Kick a pow ReviewsThis is a bit different from what I typically read and review I don t often read non fiction but when my mom got this out of the library and I read the inside flap I new I would have to give it a shot It sounded like something I could relate to and possibly benefit from and it was As soon as I started it I was totally engrossed And as I made my way through the entire thing I felt like I was learning and about myselfMy whole life I ve been an introvert I eep to myself than the people around me do I tend to prefer readingwriting to partying I m very self conscious about speaking when I talk in front of a bunch of unfamiliar people I stumble over my words and blush and feel like a moron hence I usually opt not to speak at all unless someone forces me to andor speaks to me firstI ve grown used to labels like shy and uiet to the rude uestions like Can you talk Do you speak English and Have you been in this class the whole year The confrontations and notes from teachersprofessors are expected by now You need to speak up in class Don t be shy etc Just thinking about it right now makes me want to punch a wall People act as if it s some magical switch I can turn on and off They think I don t talk much because I m incompetent because I m lazy because I m a bitch because I think I m better than everyone else People who now me well can see I m none of those things at least I hope I m not but for a lot of people it seems to be a challenge to understand that It s not that I blame them because I think it s hard to comprehend what it s like to be an introvert if you haven t experienced it yourself But still it s frustratingWhat makes being an introvert so hard is that especially in the US we are held up to what Susan Cain calls the Extrovert Ideal That is we are told our whole lives that the ideal person is an extrovert outgoing confident well spoken etc Extroverted people are thought of as being important authoritative and attractive If you are a shy you are likely to be seen as weak a pushover a bad leader an awkwardunattractive person We re constantly told that in order to succeed we need to stand up for ourselves push others out of the way be the loudest take the most risks If you re a shyintroverted person you are constantly told that you need to change that if you continue to be uiet you re never going to get anywhere in life You won t get a good job you won t succeed no one will want to date you you name it Needless to say I hate being shy I m tired of always being told that I need to speak up that I just have to be confident It s like do you think I want to be this way Do you think I enjoy not being able to say what I want to say that I feel totally idiotic every time I open my mouth that I don t even want people to look at me because I m so self conscious Trust me if I could I would be confident If I could just shut off all the thoughts in my head I would gladly speak up often But I ve always felt like my brain just wasn t wired that way People act as if it s as easy as just speaking up that the leap from being introverted to being extraverted is as easy as You Modern Korean Literature know what I m just not going to be shy today YayAnd yeah It s not like that at all It s like when I m surrounded by people I don t or only barelynow I just go on lockdown My mind doesn t generate things to say My mouth refuses to open I just completely freeze up And it s not that I don t want to participate in the conversation I wish talking was easy for me I do want to contribute Yet there s this voice in my head telling me to not say anything and to just sit back and observeSo obviously this is a very frustrating trait to have It holds me back in a lot of social situations I have trouble making friends although I do have friends so don t worry I ve managed to live for two decades without ever having a boyfriend My grades have suffered So on and so forthI ve struggled with this my whole life I constantly beat myself up about it I ve always wondered what the hell was wrong with me Why couldn t I just magically gain some confidence Why couldn t I just suck it up and be a social person I ve spent my whole life trying to find something to blame some reason why I ve always been like this Is it because I m part of a large family and therefore I ve always felt like I should just eep my problems to myself Is it because I grew up in such an academically competitive town where there was too much pressure to be the star student Of course there must be various contributing factors But according to Cain s book it may be due to nature than to nurture than we may thinkCain discusses several studies that relate introversionextroversion to sensitivity And apparently people with active amygdalae a part of the brain that plays a significant role in processing memory and emotional reactions are far likely to be introverts People fall roughly into two groups high reactive and low reactive If you are a high reactive individual you are likely to React strongly to stimuli new sounds meeting new people seeing disturbing images etc Be empathetic towards other people Be very observational notice small details React emotionally to artworkmusicbooksetc Be prone to emotional problems like anxietydepression Be very sensitive about what other people think of you and therefore become timid in social situations where you don t now many peopleThis isn t to say of course that low reactive people don t experience these things it s just that it tends to happen on a lower scale for them because their amygdalae are not as sensitive Also high reactive does not automatically eual introverted and low reactive doesn t automatically eual extroverted but research suggests a strong correlation between the two traits But what s most important to realize about levels of reactivity is that they can t be controlled Cain discusses one study in which infants were tested for how reac. The book that started the uiet RevolutionAt least one third of the people we now are introverts They are the ones who prefer listening to speaking; who innovate and create but dislike self promotion; who favor working on their own over working in teams It is to introverts Rosa Parks Chopin Dr Seuss Steve Wozniak that we owe many of the great contributions to
Ight but it is clear that she believes they don t deserve the secret introvert password and is determined to eep out the riffraff She argues that the extroverts in powerful positions she has seen are likely to take unjustified risks to get hopped up on testosterone and the thrill of the chase to listen to the loudest person in the room and to walk all over introvertsShe readily admits the nuances in these sweeping generalizations She also admits the worth of extroverts and how introverts greatly enjoy and need their company both professionally and personally In addition she also talks about some legitimate times when introverts may devote time and energy to being extroverted if they care about something enough Free Trait Theory Finally and in the part that I most appreciated Cain talks a bit about the Situational theory of personality that is that people s personalities can be completely different in different situations times and around different people Therefore there are very few pure introverts or pure extroverts She also admits that the way that these generalized traits play out may look very different and may after all not be very predictive in any direct way Many extroverts may have excellent impulse control or introverts who care deeply about a cause may act freuently and completely out of character in order to fight for what they believe inHowever the space devoted to these arguments is much much smaller than the space devoted to proving endlessly how awesome introverts are and why the professional world should value them and stop trying to tell them that they have to be like extroverts because I m okay and you re okay and it takes all inds and a village to make the world go roundAnd honestly This is a message that s happening to hit me at the right time when I m involved in a workplace with a whole lot of extroverts surrounding me I did find it useful in my particular mindset where I am actively waging a struggle to define my own style in a new profession since introversion is a part of my identity I also thought that some of the studies she cited DO make a lot of sense and should be widely looked at like the ones that talk about why it s a good idea to ask people to provide feedback and brainstorm online rather than in big meetings or why introverts with closed door offices are productive or some of the advice to parents about how to cherish their introverted child I also think that it s nice to have someone sounding the alert that someone speaking uietly is not wrong by default turn on cable news for thirty seconds and you ll be reminded why that is importantAnd yet despite the evident time put into this book and despite my bias towards it I couldn t shake the feeling of cynical uestioning of what felt like a great deal of pop psychology and arguments made based on feelings anecdotes and newspaper clippings collected into a narrative It felt like a file you might eep to make yourself feel better and to express an important part of your identity rather than a research paper and I m sure it was aiming at something closer to that crossed with an advice column There s such a lot of speculation in here and lots of scientific studies without citations or countervailing evidence brought into play For example it certainly didn t help that the minute after I read one of the fluffy scientific studies in here about how we Americans as a culture are drawn to people that display significantly traditionally dominant body language in pictures I saw it in an issue of Marie Claire in a box near the back of the magazine reconfigured to be about women being attracted to men and how you ve gotta look aggressive and Manly to get us ladiezz don t you Taking Stage know It just seems like a book written for a specific audience that you can rely on to make that leap to justnow what you mean because they ve got an emotional bank of misunderstood years and moments to draw on In short it appeals to an emotional truth built on hundreds of pages of stories and studies that may or may not add up to anything at all On the one hand it s maybe okay to create a space for a community of sorts to feel and process some of that on the other hand it will drag down the overall uality of that work into something closer to a melancholy history crossed with a dinner party argument Therefore despite its strengths and despite the personal enjoyment and help that I have taken from the book at this particular time I can t rate it as than an above average read An intellectualized comfort read for introverted professionals really if such a specialized category really exists I can t rate it higher when I feel like one good scholarly journal review would take the whole theory down especially when it feels like an argument for corporations to pay introverts a lot of the time Nonetheless a lot of interesting uestions asked a lot of self reflection inspired Recommended for my fellow introverts if you re at a place where you feel like something like I described above might be helpful to you at this time Otherwise I d say you could skip it or just watch her TED talk instead There s zero correlation between being the best talker and having the best ideas I read this book for the same reason most people read this book I am an introvert I have always been an introvert and it s a fundamental sometimes limiting part of who I am I ve learned to deal with it better over the years learned to clasp my shaking hands together during presentations force myself to breathe normally and eep my voice steady even force myself to make the first move in social situations Unless you are also an introvert you probably won t understand the efforts I have to go to and the psychological strain this puts on me just to behave in a way that is considered socially acceptable and is desired by employersIt s actually caused me upset and distress for many reasons Firstly because I find it hard to cope in the many situations wh. De after his talks to a record breaking salesman who uietly taps into the power of uestions Passionately argued superbly researched and filled with indelible stories of real people uiet has the power to permanently change how we see introverts and eually important how they see themselvesNow with Extra Libris material including a reader’s guide and bonus conte.
Free Pdf uietThe Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking á Susan Cain – latinboyz4play.com
Tive they were to stimuli and a majority of high reactive infants grew up to be introverts while the low reactive infants tended to grow up to be extroverts It s studies such as these that suggest we don t choose introversion or extroversion they are built into our DNA One can easily fake one or the other That is you can be an introvert and still speak a lot and socialize freuently it s just that as an introvert you will be drained by social interaction Because introverts are often high reactive individuals and therefore react strongly to stimuli a room of new faces is much exhausting to process than it would be for someone who is low reactive I could go on and on about this but of course if you want to learn I highly suggest reading this book There s a lot of fascinating information about the subject uiet seriously changed the way I think about myself I still dislike being shy and introverted for many reasons But after reading this I also now that I might not have the same creative and observant traits that I have now if I were extroverted instead And importantly I The Survival List know that it isn t my fault for being this way and that millions of people face the same struggle that I do I don tnow if I can say that I really accept who I am at least not yet But at least I feel like I understand it a lot betterOver all I think this book is well written and well researched and Cain narrates it with heart and humor drawing from her own experience as an introvert alongside her studies of the subject I thought uiet was brilliant and I recommend it to introverts and extroverts alike Flying Kick a pow Reviews What an affirmation While listening to this book I was constantly reminded of Al Franken s Saturday Night Live character Stuart Smalley and his mantra I m good enough I m smart enough and doggone it people like me Well those who understand me do Full disclosure according to the Myers Briggs Personality Test I m an ISFJThere were so many points of affirmation for me things I intuitively new Things I ve tried to share with others mostly to no avail This book supplies all the data I need to support my case Unfortunately I don t think the people who need to readlisten this book extroverts willThe book is not an introverts are superior diatribe but rather an explanation of how we can leverage personality types most effectively There is no right or best personality type but like life in general we need to understand each other for harmonious relationships Whether these relationships are family work or social applications of understanding are documented throughout the bookThere was one example in the book that hit particularly close to home Although SAT or I scores do not support it people who talk are perceived as leaders And which personality type talks Extroverts Now assume that both extroverts and introverts have an eual amount of good ideas Who is going to get their way Extroverts This could be dangerous because they re going to get their way meaning that many of their bad ideas are also going to be implementedOh another thing I intuitively new but now have support for is brainstorming sessions Studies show the larger the number of people involved in a session the less effective they are A 9 member group is less effective than a 6 member group which is less than effective than a 4 member group which is less effective than a 2 member group The suggestion is to conduct brainstorming sessions electronically Collect comments and then share them anonymously and build from there One of the reasons is that most introverts are better writers than speakersOther examples from the business world give tips for how both introverted and extroverted leaders can best work with their subordinates of each type Take advantage of each of their In a twist that will surprise precisely no one this book spends a fair amount of time cheering for introverts What were the odds right I assume if you re picking this book up you re on board with that to a certain extent and likely something of an introvert yourself This book is certainly for you or for the perplexed extrovert or pseudo extrovert that might be confused by your supposedly mysterious ways It s a sort of shield a blockade a set of reinforced walls that Cain feels it is necessary to throw up around introverts particularly American introverts to protect them from the Extrovered Ideal of American socialization The tone of the beginning of the book is thus rather defiant like Cain is screaming back at everyone she has ever felt pressured by to go to a happy hour or to a dinner party when she had much rather just read a book instead There s some of this ick back throughout the book with plenty of catharticsympatheticrather relatable war stories from introverts just tryin to make it in an extrovert s world It is particularly meant to speak to introverts in the high flying business legal andor educational world where a premium is put on socializing teamwork constant connection and multitasking I am speaking here particularly of the rarefied worlds of Big Law Wall Street Finance and Ivy League academia It s a very career and work focused book with a surprisingly freuent focus on the bottom line about what traits introverts are likely to have and how these should be recognized at the top tables in all fields Her argument based on one scientific study after another throughout the chapters deployed like so much artillery is that introverts tend to think deeply about problems and persist for longer in trying to solve them Introverts are supposedly likely to care about the feelings of others to make excellent compromising leaders and to be excellent negotiators Cain s particular area of expertise based on their ability to seem soft and actually be tough at the same time She scorns the merely shy as extroverts in disguise who share extroverts traits and want the spotlight but who are just too scared to get it she would never say this outr. Ociety In uiet Susan Cain argues that we dramatically undervalue introverts and shows how much we lose in doing so She charts the rise of the Extrovert Ideal throughout the twentieth century and explores how deeply it has come to permeate our culture She also introduces us to successful introverts from a witty high octane public speaker who recharges in solitu.
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